Monday, January 7, 2008

Monday Poetry Train - Double Triolet

Because I am a sucker for assignments in form and poetic challenges... I combined two of Poefusions assignments, one being a triolet (which I haven't written in years) and the other being her Friday Five (in which she picks five random words we have to write in our poem).

When I was at Naropa, poet Pat Reed had us write what she called "double sonnets" and "double triolets." Which were basically one right after the other either continuing the sentiment or, even more fun, responding to it.

One thing that wasn't mentioned on Poefusion, is that a traditional triolet is written in iambic tetrameter.

Double Triolet for a Mind’s Mad Fiction

When I reach sleep I dream as moss
concordant breath connecting me
to other world’s distorted toss
when I reach sleep I dream as moss
bewildered lashes fishing free
when I reach sleep I dream as moss
concordant breath connecting me

I reminisce throughout the day
about the polestar of that path
across the vellum on display
I reminisce throughout the day
bookmarking mind’s material bath
I reminisce throughout the day
about the polestar of that path

Poefusion's Friday Five: fiction, reminisce, moss, distorted, vellum

Okay, I DID it... I didn't say it was a GOOD poem. haha.

Get on the Poetry Train


gautami tripathy said...

I have not written a triolet for a long time now. Your double triolet is really good. It has inspired me to write one.

I like tghe clever way you used those F 5 words too.

one too many

Danika / OpenChannel said...

Thanks, I may tweak it a bit more.

I sort of cheated on the word "fiction" - I used it in the title of the poem and not the poem itself.

Michelle Johnson said...

Good Morning, Danika! I absolutely love your triolet. And, the use of the words is spectacular. I wish mine were that good. Stop by Poefiti and take a look, if you like.

I can't believe I have two books-
The Teachers & Writers Handbook of Poetic Form and The Poetry Dictionary and NEITHER of them mention that the triolet is in iambic tetrameter. I did find wikipedia to mention iambic tetrameter but, I believed my books instead. I will make the change today. Thanks for pointing that out.

I am so glad you stopped by. I thoroughly enjoyed reading your triolet. And, to answer your question, I am doing well. I have been posting to each of my blogs lately and trying to clean up this house.

Well, I have written a book. Have a nice day.

Susan Helene Gottfried said...

I love the way it flows and has a strong rhythm (I know, it's the iambic stuff at work), but it gives it such a chipper, upbeat mood.

Totally digging this one, Danika!

Danika / OpenChannel said...

Hi Michelle and thanks.

I love the T&W book - I've used it in the classroom many times. My guess is that it's a hard enough form without having your students write in iambic tetrameter. Even high school students struggle with that.

I've seen it both ways and it what people call "loose iambic tetrameter." I was just interested in giving myself the ultimate challenge. haha.

Danika / OpenChannel said...

Hi Susan and thanks! Every once in a while it's fun to write a metered poem.

Anonymous said...

ok a triolet! new one for me

and end rhymes! my goodness--what will happen next!

it was a fun trip down the lane--when i saw vellum i said whoa now that's a 315 word --then saw it was one for the 5.

good for you for finding the inspiration and taking up the challenge!

and good to see you on the train again!

Danika / OpenChannel said...

Hey AP -

yeah, vellum is a great word. polestar strikes me as a good 3:15 word, too... I have no idea how that popped into my consciousness.

Yup, I'm back on the train. Woooot!

LittleWing said...

that was excellent....well worthy of the effort...